When I Go, I'm Going Like Topaz

Lady Valerie

Miss Samantha

Saturday night, marked the 5th March Dragness, and it was a memorial of sorts, for a fallen queen, Topaz.  It was a hell of a show, and a night I'll never forget.  And, it's how I want to go out.  When I die, I'm going to beg for a drag show send off.  And, if I don't get one, I can always come back and haunt people until I get one...

Going into this show, I believed that every drag show was pretty much the same thing.  Queen A performs, Queen B performs, Queen C performs, and then the show is pretty much over.  I know that some queens put feeling into their lip syncs, and some perform their own songs.  And, in my head, this is just how shows go.  This show, showed me that you can't always just jump to conclusions that every show is going to be the same.  Because, they are decidedly not all the same.

Asia

Emma

The crowd in Bangor is different than that of Portland.  For one, the crowd in Portland, tends to be a gay crowd, and we're all packed into Blackstones or Styxx.  In Bangor, I would say, that the homos were the minority.  The crowd at Hollywood Casino was a decidedly mixed crowd.  To the left was an older (50-60 year old) straight couple, behind me was a group of girls (barely 21's) who could have used a mute button.  And, spattered throughout the crowd, were faces I recognized.  Some from "home" (read as Portland area), others, who I know from Facebook.

Miss Joanne

Paris Lynne

The show was on a tight schedule, and had to be over in exactly two hours.  None of the usual "We'll start when there's a good enough crowd to start," that plagues a lot of drag shows.  Once the show started, it was banged out act after act.  As usual, I got caught up in taking pictures, which is my MO, at shows.  I know that there's music, but rarely, can I tell you at the end of the night, which performer performed to what song.  But, there were a few acts that I don't know if I'll ever be able to forget.

Shaunna Rai

Candy Cayne

Shaunna Rai gets her usual shout outs, because I live with her, and I wouldn't hear the end of it if I didn't.  But, she's always amazing, so it's to be expected.  Her first performance was a mix of songs by Pink, that I've seen a few times.  She looked like Pink.  And, she surprised the audience.  The whispers at the beginning, of "What the..." quickly turned to whispers of "Oh my God, she actually looks like Pink," as the rip away came off.  When she did her second number, Tina Turner's Proud Mary, there were ripples again, through the audience of "She's not seriously going to..." By the end of the song, any doubt that she could pull it off was gone, and a good majority of the audience was actually singing along to the song.  (Something that I always do anyway, without thinking about it, but haven't seen happen before.)

Justin Case

Mikayla Loveheart

Asia Thavone, who I had met once before at Mama's Cabaret, last summer, was another standout performer.  If I remember correctly, she did a Whitney number for her first number.  But, the standout performance, was her second number.  She dedicated Bette Midler's Wind Beneath My Wings to Topaz.  And, I got a bit choked up.  The song itself, in combination with a memorial of any sort, is just enough to get the tears flowing.  Combine that with an amazing performance, which looked like it got to Asia herself (I couldn't tell for sure, as I was all the way in the back row, fighting to see over a woman whose head I swear was bigger than a watermelon).

Miss Samantha

Valerie

Paris Lynne, another queen who I met through Mama's Cabaret, last fall, performed Stacy Q's Two of Hearts, for her first number, and alternated co-hosting with Lady Valerie Honeywell.  But, her standout number, was Christina Perry's Human.  It was a song that I hadn't actually heard prior to the show, and one that I have added to my iPod, after seeing her perform to it.  She was one of the last numbers of the night, and you could tell at the beginning of the song, that the night was getting to her. By the end of the song, I really just wanted to go hug her, and tell her that it was going to be okay, and that Topaz would've been proud of her.  The amount of emotion that went into the performance again, choked me up.

Emma

Asia

And, then came the finale.  Valerie gathered all the queens on the stage.  Shaunna Rai, Candy Cayne, Asia, Justin, Emma, Paris, Samantha, Joanne, Mikayla, Paris and Valerie.  The dedication of the final number to both Topaz and Amanda Kelley, and their families, who were in the audience was touching.  When Valerie picked up one of Topaz's costumes, from the corner of the stage, and lay it on the stage, and sang to it, and then invited the family to pay their respects to the costume, it made it hard to not get emotional, whether you knew them or not.

Miss Joanne

As the show itself was a fund raiser, I'm curious to find out how much was actually made.  The show sold out of early tickets, and at the end of the night, it was standing room only.

Paris Lynne

Anyway, as I was driving (most of the way home) I told Dan, that's what I want, if I happen to die before he does.  I want to have a show in my honor.  Selfish? Maybe. But, in a way, it's for them.  A sentiment, that I generally hear more from my own family, that I heard last night was, "We really need to stop meeting this way." Because, in general, sickness and death are the two things that bring people together.  But, life goes on.  And, if it gives a group of performers a reason to perform, why not let it be known?  Because, as I'm coming to realize, life is too short to be unhappy.  I know I was smiling at the end of the night, and I'm sure that Topaz was as well, knowing that she brought together a group of her friends, who put on one hell of a show.

Shaunna Rai

Justin Case

Mikayla Loveheart

Candy Cayne

The Final Number, all the queens and half the audience

"It's Showtime Synergy!"

Kids growing up now, have very little imagination. Everything comes to them immediately.  And, what doesn't, is taken care of by their (insert name of electronic device here.)  

Growing up in the '80's, there were a lot fewer electronics, and a lot more imagination.  For one, you had to come up with things to do, because my parents made us go outside and play.  Sometimes, for me, playing meant taking a book outside, climbing a tree, and reading, high up in the branches, until supper was ready.  But, a lot of times, that time was spent imagining that I was someone else, doing something more interesting. 

Why wouldn't this be the case?  

The '80's brought us Tom Hanks and Peter Scolari doing drag on network tv in Bosom Buddies.  And, Dustin Hoffman in drag in Tootsie.  As a kid, I was inundated with alter egos.  Superman/Clark Kent, Bruce Wayne/Batman, Bruce Banner/The Hulk, Jerrica Benton/Jem, Prince Adam/He-Man, just to name a few. And, then one of my favorite books: Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde.  Alter egos, are just cool. 

Somewhere along the lines, I lost that in myself.  I went from being Steve, who led adventures through the jungle, in the neighbor's field, where the grass grew taller than I was (where we always ran the chance of being yelled at by a wicked witch for being there), to who I am now. Steve, who speaks little, listens a lot, and wishes that some day his mutant power will show itself, so that I can be cool.  The likelihood of that actually happening is about zilch.  But, it doesn't mean that I can't hope.

So, you're probably wondering what my point is in all of this?  For whatever reason, the drag community gets me back in touch with that part of my childhood.  The part that makes it so that everything is possible, and I don't have to be a boring adult forever.  In a way, I'm lucky, in that I don't have to stand outside the phone booth to watch the transformation happen, or be in the bat cave.  It takes much longer than the cartoons make it out to, but I get to watch the transformation in the same room, if I choose to.  Maybe we're not out saving the world, but every so often, I get to be a part of something, where I can feel like I am making a difference.  Shaunna Rai does a lot of things for AIDS Awareness, through the Frannie Peabody Center, and has taken up the Pride Portland cause as well.  These have become my causes as well, in part because they're hers, but in part, because I need to feel like I'm doing something good for the world.  (See how I fall back to the kid of the '80's? Good must always prevail over evil.  And, knowing, is half the battle.)

So, maybe I'm not a getaway driver for a bank robber.  And, maybe I'm not a superhero in a speedo and blue tights.  But, every so often, I get to be the chauffeur, for one of the best known drag performers in the state of Maine.  Pair that with the fact that at the end of the night, Shaunna Rai or Dan, is going home with me, and that's all I need.  Who needs an alter ego? Although, I'm still not opposed to mutant powers.  Just sayin', if anyone knows anyone who can make that happen for me...

"We're Born Naked, the Rest is Just Drag." --RuPaul

Robin Williams as Mrs. Doubtfire.

Over the past couple of weeks, I've been in training for two new jobs.  In the two weeks that I've been training, I've gotten to know some of the people I've had classes with well.  In some cases, to the point of being slightly uncomfortable... I mean, when you're talking about doing restraints, you get really up close and personal with them, physically.  Thus, the uncomfortability.

How many times has Bugs done drag?

Anyway, given the fact that I've been going to the fundraisers for Portland Pride, there were a few days that I felt exhausted, while I was in class.  One of the ladies in my class, asked me yesterday what the fundraisers were for.  So, I told her.  They're for Pride, and I'd attended to support the fundraising effort, but more importantly to support Shaunna Rai.

Spongebob does drag.

And, Manilla Luzon, a drag queen,
does Spongebob.

Through the course of the discussion, a few things came up.  She knew nothing of Pride, aside from the parade, so I gave her a rundown, of my understanding of the events of the past year, and why it's no longer called Southern Maine Pride, and now called Pride Portland.  (I pretty much glossed over it, because I don't personally know everything that has gone on with it.  I just know that the name change is for legal reasons.)  Anyway, one of the events that I've heard talk of, is a drag bowling event.  Just bowling, and Drag queens.  Personally, I can't see why a person would not allow their kid to bowl with drag queens.  It's just another way to prove that you're accepting of everyone.

Robin Williams shows up a second time, as Genie "cheers" for Jafar,
in Aladdin

Divine IS Ursula. Just sayin'...

What followed, was "Well, how do I explain drag to my kids? They're young, and I just don't know how to get them to understand it."  My gut response, which was unfortunately, not the response that I gave, was "Why do you need to explain it to them?"  Kids, in general, have a better grasp of what Drag is, and what it means, than most adults that I know.  I mean, think about it: Mrs. Doubtfire: Robin Williams in drag.  Aladdin: Genie and Iago BOTH impersonate women.  The Lion King: Timon literally says he's going to "Dress in drag and do the hula, OY!"  Looney Tunes: Bugs Bunny has been dressing in drag for well over 50 years.  The Little Mermaid: The Sea Witch, Ursula's character is based on the drag queen Divine. And, that's just the tip of the iceberg when it comes to places where kids have seen drag, and it hasn't had any kind of negative impact on their lives.

My actual response was a quote from To Wong Foo, Thank You For Everything, Julie Newmar. Wesley Snipes's character Noxeema Jones said, "When a gay man has way too much fashion sense for one gender, he is a drag queen."  My thinking was that a kid could understand that. But, I realized after talking to Dan about it later, that I am not a parent, and I have a much more open mind to things that aren't necessarily "normal," than your average person does.

When I explained the situation to Dan, he reminded me that kids usually don't have an issue with drag.  Given the exposure that they get from both cartoons, and shows on the Disney Channel, or Nickelodeon, it doesn't require a lot of explanation.  The issue is not with the children, but rather with the parents who are closed minded.  He also reminded me of the title quote from RuPaul.  "We're born naked, the rest is just drag."

Dan says, "Every person, no matter who they are, does some form of drag.  Every piece of clothing that you put on, you're putting on to impress someone.  Every bit of makeup a person puts on is to impress someone.  That's drag.  That's what drag is all about.  It's when a man dresses as a woman, or a woman as a man, to entertain another person, in an attempt to get some attention.

With that explanation, you really don't need anything else.  There's no reason to have to explain drag.  Drag just is. It always has been.  Back in the day, male actors played female characters, because there were no actresses, with the exception of those who played in drag.  In more recent times, drag has been a part of society that was solely for entertainment...take Cabaret, for example, or Victor/Victoria...

I was reminded that I was being ageist, when I tried to "defend" the asker, stating that she appeared to be an older woman.  And, I was reminded, that this was a personal issue, not necessarily an age issue, as some of the best tippers, at shows, and biggest fans of drag queens, are people over the age of 50.

So, after all that, my revised answer of how to explain drag to your kids?  Expose them to it. If they have questions answer honestly. There's nothing weird about someone who does drag. If you don't have any experience with drag, do some research.  Drag queens are people too, and more often than not, they're willing to answer any questions that you may have.

Big Doings....

I often feel like there is either a ton of stuff going on, or nothing going on.  Just like last year, the spring is the kick-off for drag season.  (I really hadn't thought about it, but the beginning of Drag Race, is more or less the unofficial beginning of Shaunna Rai's drag season.)

Last week, was the official start of Shaunna Rai's Happy Hours at Blackstones.  It was also the start of two new jobs for me.  Well, one new job, and being hired at a second.  So, Friday night, we decided to go out to celebrate.  

I had a few drinks. Chad and his man came, and hung out for a while.  Then, they left.  And, then, apparently, all hell broke loose.  Dan asked me if I wanted another drink, and I accepted.  I took a couple of sips of the new drink.  And, then, everything else I know, until I got home, I'm relying on hearing from other people.  Apparently, at some point, after the second sip of my drink, I lost consciousness.  I fell off my stool, and ended up on the floor.  My eyes rolled up in my head, and I was babbling incoherently.  I got up and back on a stool, and then, within minutes, I was back on the floor again, unconscious.  JR, the bartender gave me a glass of water (which I do remember) that I took a sip of, and then, BAM!  Back on the floor, unconscious.  The next thing I remember, was coming home, Dan asking me if I was okay. And, my going to sleep.  The next morning, the only thing I could think of was that I now knew what it felt like to be an abused person.  When I fell, I apparently, fell on some steps.  With my face.  And my arm.  I'm still sore in both spots, and it's been almost a week.

Tonight, is the first of a few events for Pride Fundraisers.  The next one, will be on Friday, at Blackstones.  Tonight, though, is at Styxx.  I was grateful, that today, after my training, I didn't have shadowing at the second job.  I got to come home and take a little bit of a nap, before the girls started getting ready.  Shaunna and Vanila will be serving up shots at Styxx, while some of the heads of the Pride Committee will be guest bartending, and Cherry Lemonade will be DJing.  And, it will all conclude with a show, around 11pm tonight.  

For me, tonight, is both a good thing, and a curse.  It's great, because it's something that I feel strongly about. We need Pride.  I've lived too many years, just being the gay guy, who didn't acknowledge that there was anything even a tiny bit good about being gay.  Last year was my first Portland Pride. And, given that I'm a Portland-er, I feel that given everything that is going on with the old committee and creating a whole new committee to chair Pride this year, I need to do what I can.  So, I'm already promoting any kind of fundraiser that I can.  And, I'm going to be as much of a part of it as I can be.  Whether that means that I'm posting facebook posts, or blogging about it, or attending events.  Even if I have to be at work at 8:30am, and ready to learn CPR/First Aid (again) tomorrow.

I guess, what it comes down to, is that I've never really been able to advocate for anything, or anyone, other than clients that I've worked with, doing the social work thing.  And, I've always wanted, and believed that I was meant to advocate for more.  I should be able to stand up for gay rights, or Pride, or AIDS research, or whatever the hell I want to.  Now, I have both the outlets and the abilities to do so.  So, I need to really take advantage of it.  

So, if you have time, and money, to do so, consider coming out to Styxx in Portland tonight, or Blackstones Portland, on Friday.  Or just donate what you can to Pride Portland, at: http://www.gofundme.com/prideportland

Ask Me Something Interesting!

After I started this blog, Dan started getting requests to answer some questions about drag for people who, like myself, were doing research.  In my case, it's for a blog.  In other cases, it's for college papers, or what have you.

When I created my list of questions that I would just randomly ask any queen who wanted to answer for me, I thought that they were good questions, that anyone would want to know the answers to.  So, after Dan answered the third set of questions, and asked, "Do people realize how many times I answer the same questions? I wish that people would just ask me something different once in a while."

Obviously, people are the most interested in the things that seem the most basic to the person who gets asked them all the time.  So, being the curious person I am, I asked.  "So, what would you rather people ask?"  To which, I got asked a question in return.

"IF you could ask any queen, whether it were me, or Jujubee or Mizery, anything, what would you ask them?  And I'm not talking the fluffy stuff, like how long. Like REAL questions."

And, it got me really to think about what WOULD I ask, if I had the chance.  My thought process went to the usual.  I have an obsession for understanding drag names, and where they come from.  That's my own personal weirdness, but I think other people think it's interesting too. Maybe. Or, maybe it really is just me.  (Fluffy.)  How long have you been doing drag? (Fluffy)  How did you get your start in drag? (Fluffy)

Everything that first comes to mind is fluff.  It's the same set of questions that get asked over and over and over, hundreds of times.  And, once I got that, I realized, there needs to be more to the questions, in order for you to not be the same as everyone else.  This can be accomplished by looking at what you really want to discover from the questions that you ask.

While, in my head, a question like, "How did you get your start?" is all encompassing, to a queen, it's literally about the first time they did drag.  Where, in my head, it's "Tell me about the first time you did drag.  How did you get your name? Who is your drag family? And, a number of other questions that need to actually come out of my mouth (or fingers, as the case may be.) A question that I came up with, on my own, without having to ask a hundred other questions to get the round answer that I wanted, was "What is it about Drag that keeps you coming back to do it? It takes time and money, and can be less than stellar, depending on where, when and who is involved.  You could make a killing with tips, or you could leave with nothing, because you're either going just for exposure, or, because you're donating your time.

Of course, I haven't met Jujubee, to ask her.  And, I haven't seen Mizery, since the last time we went to Club 313 in Manchester.  And, I think when I actually asked that, Dan didn't answer it for me.  Bear in mind, this was a month or two ago, so I may have forgotten if there was an answer, because we were on other business when the subject came up.

Anyway, so we had this conversation, and moved on from it.  And then, a couple weeks ago, a friend asked Dan if he would answer some questions for a research paper.  First thing he said, upon receiving the questions was "Don't you people know how many times I'm asked the same things?" And, he handed me the phone, knowing full well, that I was going to write about this later.  And, sure enough, the majority of the questions were questions that I had already asked him.  Sure, there were a few new/different questions.  But, overall, they set the same tone, as far as content.

So, next time you want to ask a queen a question, try to be mindful of the fact that they're always being asked the same set of questions, about the how/when/why's of it all.  Try to be original, and ask something that will be a little meatier for them.  Don't fluff it up in order to seem like you don't really want to know something.  If you want to know, ASK.  They'll answer.  They might just gripe about the questions at a later date.

That being said, what would you ask a drag queen, if you could ask anything you chose?

Drag Race: Episode 2 (There may be Spoilers)

I have yet to make it to Taffy Pulls's Watch Drag Race show at Styxx.  Hopefully, soon.  But, anyway.

So, the first episode bugged me, because I would rather know all my queens all at once, so I can pick and choose who I like, and who I don't.  Because I'm judgmental like that, and I prefer all my eggs in one basket, so to speak.  That being said, it made it harder for me to pick, because I have people from each group that I want to see do well.  And, if I don't narrow the two groups down, to, say, a Final Four, RuPaul will do it for me.

I've been debating how to proceed from here with the Drag Race stuff.  Part of me wants to keep people updated on how my ladyboys are doing, but I don't necessarily want to go into a fully in-depth breakdown of each episode.  Other bloggers who've been doing it from the beginning have that market.  So, I'll just see from here, how it goes.  It might be a breakdown, it might just be a skimming of the girls I liked this episode.

So, the second set of girls:

Bianca Del Rio:  This one has had me hooked since the previews started for the show.  I'm not sure if it's the makeup or what, but she is one of my top girls.  And, became even more so, once I actually got to hear her. I love that she's an insult comic. I hope that she goes right up to the end.  But, I refuse to speculate, because when I picked my top group last year, I got only one right.

Trinity K Bonet: From what I hear, she's beautiful. I'm not really digging her.  I didn't get the wire around her head in her walk-in outfit.  Although, her Queen Amidala realness was good.  A little too geisha for my liking, but whatever. Having seen the episode a few times, it's growing on me.

Joslyn Fox:  She's from Massachusetts, so she's a hometown(ish) girl.  She dresses like Shaunna Rai does.  She's goofy and cute, and she's coming to Ogunquit in May.  And I'm going to be there too! I'm going to be a little bit fangirl-ish the week of the Southern Maine AIDS Walk/Run, because I get that way with new queens that I don't know...especially if they've been on TV.  Like Joslyn herself was, when Courtney Act walked in. She's one of my people to watch.

Milk:  Milk scares me a little bit.  She's so tall, and thin, and, the gap in her teeth makes me fear that if she were to take a deep breath, I would get sucked through the tooth gap...even though, I know that it's a drawn on gap.  It's not real. It still scares me though.

Magnolia Crawford: Oh, Magnolia...Attitude is everything.  But, a bad attitude, well, it doesn't get you anywhere.  I liked her interview as a boy, during her walk-in, when she was like "The sexiest...I'm not sexy." It was funny.  And, it gave me hope for her.  Unfortunately, because she just wanted to use Drag Race to get her name out there, and didn't care that she was going to be deemed a bitchy queen, we didn't get to really see the fun/funny side of her.

Courtney Act: "Is this America's Next Top Model?" If I didn't know better, I would have believed that she was actually a woman.  A lot of drag queens, you can tell that they're actually male.  Not this one.  She's beautiful. And, when you put both of her personas next to each other, they come off as brother and sister, NOT the same person in drag. That takes talent.

Darienne Lake:  She actually liked a fan art drawing that I did of her.  (Because I wanted to, and her hair is awesomely huge.)  And, she's following me on Twitter.  So, obviously, I want her to do well. And, Mike Ruiz long distance motorboated her. Was I crazy about her runway outfit? Not really.  But, her personality was great. And her lip sync was dead on.

I loved the pillow fight photo shoot, for all of them, except Magnolia.  It was like she didn't even WANT to be a part of the shoot.  I have to say, with the Pit Crew in nothing but Scruff undies, I would be all over doing whatever Mike Ruiz told me to do...wait, what? Was I daydreaming? Crap...

The Mystery Box outfit challenge: I love it when they show that either the contestants know exactly what they're going to do, or when they have no idea what they're going to do.  What I hate, is when they take a box personally.  You can get a horrible box, and make something awesome out of it.  You can get a great box and make something horrible out of it.  It all depends on your talent and creativity.  But, when the box itself becomes a zone of contention, between not only the queen and the box, but, Ru too, you might as well give up and leave the workroom, and save Ru from eliminating anyone... Just sayin'.

Let's Have a Kiki

Shaunna's Friday look

Some of you will know what that means.  Others, will think that I'm making up words.

According to Urban Dictonary, a Kiki is:

A party including good music and good friends, held for the express purpose of calming nerves, reducing anxiety and stress and generally fighting ennui. May involve locked doors, tea and salacious gossip

In the drag world, this is a term that refers to two or more queens getting ready together.  

Dana and I with the girls

One would think, that after a year and a half, that I would be used to the conversations that drag queens have.  But, deep down, I'm still the small town boy, who blushes when someone says I'm hot, much less when they're talking about anything dirty.  And, drag queens thrive on double entendres and skewing conversation so that it sounds dirty, even if it really isn't.  An example, "You've always got to clean the tip afterward." Maybe it was the Cape Cod and a half that I'd had, but when this came up in conversation, regarding eyelash glue, I couldn't help but think that it was meant to sound like something else... I'll leave it up to your imagination to figure out what that could possibly mean.

Sheneeda Diet

Anyway, this was a weekend of drag. Shaunna Rai and Vanila Honey-Bush got their kiki on, although, they were headed to two different locations, only to end up back at the same location...Blackstones.

Shaunna Rai

 Shaunna Rai and I went out to Mainestreet Ogunquit, for the Mardi Gras party, for a little bit.  We met some friends there. I might have made fun of a guy who sounded a little bit like Willie Nelson while he was karaoke-ing. And, then we went back to Portland, for Blackstones.  The night took a turn for the better once we got back to Portland.  I was more relaxed. I met a fan of my blog. (I keep finding out people are reading it, and it still surprises me that anyone's interested in what I have to say.)  

Miss E'on

The night, like the first night that I met Dan, ended up at Denny's.  Shaunna, Chad, Chad's man, and Lee. We were greeted at the door, by a couple ladies, who proclaimed to be the welcome wagon.  On the way in, they were like, "That lady is really tall." And, of course, Shaunna Rai, being Shaunna Rai, said, "And, he has a big dick." Stories were told, and fun was had.  At the end of the night, Shaunna got Dan a potential new client, by handing out a business card.  This woman loved Shaunna's "extensions." So, they got talking, and Shaunna was like, "I'm a man." And, the woman freaked out a little, but not before telling her friend, "I told you so!"  And, then, it was time to go home and get some sleep, because the drag was going to be happening all over again on Saturday.

Leanna Love

The morning started off badly. The landlords at our apartment, pay a bare minimum, apparently, for care for the parking lot behind the building.  Thus, it's a sheet of ice, that probably won't be gone until mid May... And, we got stuck on it.  After calling them, knocking on their door, and sending them a text, to see if anything could be done, I still got no response.  Although, they did get a car that was blocking us in, to move, so that we could get out.  Fishy much?  From there, things started looking up.  Dan and I have found a place that sells Gluten Free Donuts, so, I can stop feeling deprived of donuts.  The Holy Donut, is one of my new favorite places in town.  I recommend the pomegranate glazed and the chai glazed donuts.

Vanila's signature split

Once I had a happy tummy, Dan started packing Shaunna's bags, and getting ready to go.  And, I got to go shopping... For shoes... For Shaunna. I've been lucky, for the most part.  Dan never makes me do anything that I'm totally uncomfortable with.  And he's made it clear that if I'm not up for doing it, that I need to speak up and tell him.  That being said, I had reservations about going out, specifically to buy pumps. "You know what ones I'm talking about, right?"  "Yes, they're the ones that are half neon yellow vinyl looking, and half black velvet, with wings. And, I'm buying a matress pad for your AIDS walk outfit, and the nude color shoes from Deb's..." And, yep, that's what I did.   And, I just about died, when I bought the yellow and black shoes, and the cashier looks at me and says, "Wow, you're the second guy to come in and buy these shoes today."  Um...ok...wow...

Miss E'on

Sheneeda Diet

So, yeah.  The car got loaded up for the trip to Lewiston. And, we were off, like a herd of turtles (because apparently, I drive like an old lady, who ISN'T from Pasedena.  We got there, and got settled down, and then came the call for alcohol.  The ladies like to pregame while they're getting ready for a show.  Only, nobody thought to get alcohol, before we got to Lewiston.  So, it became my responsibility to go out and get some, while they started getting ready.  I managed. With a GPS, and a little luck.  Because I have no idea where I am, most of the time.  I'm one of those totally, undeniably stupid people with directions.  "You go, right, then right, then right, in my head, means that I'm going around in a circle.  Not that there's still one more right to make it a full trip around the block... But, I survived, and managed to get back, with alcohol.  So, all was good.

Shaunna Rai,
Mannequin Realness

The kiki leading up to the show...well, it was like it always is.  A lot of talking. A bit of calling people out. Some joking about things. And, a lot of vague references to the male anatomy, veiled by the conversation itself.  While the kiki is the weirdest part for me, because it's when the guys turn into the girls...and it doesn't always happen when the makeup is on.  Sometimes it's before.  Or, midway.  At some point, the conversations change just ever so slightly, so that you know that it's no longer Dan talking, but Shaunna Rai.  For all intensive purposes, it's jarring, even after so long.  Upcoming shows were being planned.  And, then, suddenly, everyone was ready.

Joey Starr

Having never been to the Acme club before, I had no idea what to expect from the venue.  Apparently, it's a private club, and so smoking in the building is actually allowed, if you have a membership.  (This was both good and bad for me, because as I'm no longer smoking but sometimes like to smell it, I had that opportunity.  However, it also put the craving in my mind, and I'm still trying to stifle it, two days later.)  The main area was larger than most of the venues that Shaunna has performed at, because it wasn't confined to a stage.  The "dancefloor" area was a runway of sorts.  Which would've been great, if the patrons hadn't been so into it, and crowded the floor to get close enough to take pictures of the girls...which made it awful for me to get pictures without pushing my way through the crowd.

Leanna Love

It was a good crowd, and interestingly enough, an overwhelming support of family was there.  My parents came out to see the show, and support Shaunna.  Benni (Miss E'on)'s dad and his wife came to support, and Larry (Leanna Love)'s mom and sister came out to support.  Along with friends of ours from Portland, and even a couple of people that Dan knew as far back as 7th grade.  

Sheneeda Diet

I got to help pick out the music that Shaunna would be performing to, which is always fun. Except for when I get nervous that I've read the crowd right that a song is going to work well with the crowd, and it flops. Then, not so much. But, it worked out okay.  I also got to help Vanila get her music. She didn't have anything picked out, prior to arrival, and so, it ended up being a last minute download, and send the email to DJ Craig.  And, for whatever reason, my email decided that it was going to crap out on me.  It took about 17 tries to get everything to work, before the email actually got to the DJ.

Shaunna Rai

Given that it was Mardi Gras Madness, people were dressed up with masks, and whatever.  And the main goal of the night was to get yourself some beads.  Like the real New Orleans Mardi Gras, people were willing to do whatever, in hopes of getting beads.  Except my mom.  While we were waiting for the show to start, someone came out with beads.  And a rowdy table to the right of us, started chanting, "Beads, beads, beads." And, then, like a bolt of lightning, out of nowhere came these pale white globes! One of the women had flashed her chest for beads.

Vanila 

"I can tell you right now, I won't be doing THAT for beads," my mom said.  And, I had a bit of a buzz, and looked at her and said, "that's okay, I'll do it."  And, then did a bit of a nip slip, and showed off the nipple ring I got for my birthday, that neither of my parents had seen before...Come to think of it, it wasn't really worth it.  I didn't get any beads for showing it off...

Miss E'on

The show itself was great, although, the sound system was way off.  From where I'd gotten my seat, I could hear about two words out of every 5, between feedback from the mic and I assume, the bass.  And, it didn't really matter who was talking.  The only time that I could actually tell what was being said, was when it was a name.  And, at the end of the show, when Sheneeda Diet announced that the buffet was open.

Sheneeda Diet

To be honest, the only reason that I understood that the buffet was open, was because aside from the donuts in the morning, all I'd eaten all day was a couple of Rice Krispy treats from the gas station.  And, I'd heard that Michael (Sheneeda) had made meatballs for the buffet, and during the entire show, that was all I could smell...well that, and the cigarette smoke from downstairs.  I was starving.  And, the meatballs were amazing.  I may or may not have brought home a large ziploc bag of them...

Shaunna's outfit was
stoned by me and Dan.

At the end of a show, I tend to avoid going backstage, until I'm summoned. Only because I know what goes into tucking, and I know what's going to come out of the untucking process. And, I like to imagine that magically, they just turn back into boys.  You know, like in Cinderella, when at midnight, her dress turns back to a rag dress.  Only, with boy clothes.  So, when I go backstage, I never know what exactly to expect.  And, at the end of the night, when Shaunna's suitcase died, well, it wasn't quite the perfect ending to a good night...

Prodigy Diamond