So, you meet this guy. He's good looking. He's sweet. He's the kind of guy that you want to get to know, so you can take him home to meet the parents. And, then, he drops the bomb. You've met before. Only, he looked different. He was a she...
This has happened to me twice. Well, technically, only once, since I didn't meet T, until after the fact. But, I've had two boyfriends "come out" of "the drag closet." It's not really something that you easily acclimate to. Although, I suppose it's easier than finding out that he did time in Prison, and is the bitch of two 7 foot tall, 350 pound brutes, named Bubba...
So, how do you come to terms with this little revelation?
You either accept it, and go from there, or you run the other way, as fast as you can. And, sometimes, it may be a little difficult to know which is the proper option. With T, it was a case of, I'm going to be extremely cautious about this, because I don't know what to make of it. With Shaunna Rai, it was a little different. I'd already been through this once with T. And, Shaunna Rai and I had actually interacted, before the dating thing started.
The biggest thing about the whole, my boyfriend is sometimes a girl, issue, was "What are the ground rules for this?" Do I have to go buy dresses with him? Does he buy dresses as a boy or a girl? What exactly does he expect of me? And, what if I'm not comfortable with this, or that?
I'm getting better with the whole drag shopping thing. I've gone with Dan enough, to get stuff for Shaunna Rai, or just to window shop for her. Am I always comfortable with it? No. Am I always uncomfortable with it? That's also a no. It's really a day by day thing for me. I'm less comfortable with looking at women's clothing with Dan, than I am at women's shoes. (I may have a bit of a shoe thing, and dammit, women have way more choices of pretty shoes.) And, if the most uncomfortable thing I have to do, is spend time wandering around in the dress section of a store, I think I can handle it.
Honestly, there are much worse things than being told that your boyfriend dresses in drag...and has done so for the last 20 years...
This has happened to me twice. Well, technically, only once, since I didn't meet T, until after the fact. But, I've had two boyfriends "come out" of "the drag closet." It's not really something that you easily acclimate to. Although, I suppose it's easier than finding out that he did time in Prison, and is the bitch of two 7 foot tall, 350 pound brutes, named Bubba...
So, how do you come to terms with this little revelation?
You either accept it, and go from there, or you run the other way, as fast as you can. And, sometimes, it may be a little difficult to know which is the proper option. With T, it was a case of, I'm going to be extremely cautious about this, because I don't know what to make of it. With Shaunna Rai, it was a little different. I'd already been through this once with T. And, Shaunna Rai and I had actually interacted, before the dating thing started.
The biggest thing about the whole, my boyfriend is sometimes a girl, issue, was "What are the ground rules for this?" Do I have to go buy dresses with him? Does he buy dresses as a boy or a girl? What exactly does he expect of me? And, what if I'm not comfortable with this, or that?
I'm getting better with the whole drag shopping thing. I've gone with Dan enough, to get stuff for Shaunna Rai, or just to window shop for her. Am I always comfortable with it? No. Am I always uncomfortable with it? That's also a no. It's really a day by day thing for me. I'm less comfortable with looking at women's clothing with Dan, than I am at women's shoes. (I may have a bit of a shoe thing, and dammit, women have way more choices of pretty shoes.) And, if the most uncomfortable thing I have to do, is spend time wandering around in the dress section of a store, I think I can handle it.
Honestly, there are much worse things than being told that your boyfriend dresses in drag...and has done so for the last 20 years...
there are much worse things in life... Glad you have found someone that works for you, challenges you and that you can build a future with.
ReplyDeleteOh, I know there are much worse things in life than this. And, frankly, this isn't even a bad thing, in my mind. If drag shopping is the worst that I have to deal with, I'm willing to make that sacrifice. lol
ReplyDelete